I know………I know! I know what you are thinking. Any one of you who know me personally or will get to know me from this blog cannot imagine describing my life with the adjective ”perfect”.

Let me explain! In my short almost 46 years, I have been tested. Im pretty sure I have been to hell and back numerous times. Infertility, miscarriages, neonatal death, drug addicted spouse, divorce, single mother, and lastly widow. So yeah, right about now the term ”perfect” is not coming to mind right?

I have always been a positive person. I have always been a glass half full kinda gal. I have always rooted for the under dog. So this blog is for me rooting for myself and other whose life did not go as they dreamed it would. This blog is being written to help people in their darkest days. To help see that days can be bright again. No matter what, you will laugh and smile again I am a true testament to that!

Ok, now to get to the perfect part!

If i never struggled with infertility for 7 years with shot after shot, procedure after procedure, 4 IUI’s and 7 IVF’s, I would not have the amazing job I have today. I would not be able to connect with my clients who are struggling to build their families through egg donation. Without my infertility struggles I would not have been able to help bring 2000 babies into the world over the past 16 years. Tiny Treasures (www.Tinytreasuresagency.com) is the perfect business for me and exactly where I need to be.

If I never gave birth to Chase and Kenley and watched them pass a few hours later due to prematurity, I would have never started the ACDK Hope Foundation in their name. I would not have had the opportunity to help hundreds of bereaved parents in their loss journey that I walked before them. I also would not be the mother I am today because they taught me how precious life is. They taught me that I wanted nothing more then to be a Mother.

If I never married and divorced my first husband ( my high school sweetheart) well then i would not have Brooklynn who will be 15 and a high school freshman in the fall. She might be the most amazing human alive. You know those people who are just good at everything they do! That’s her! She watched me navigate being a single mother and learned young that you must work hard to play hard. She has the biggest hopes and dreams and a determination, well like mine! Since she was little, her dream is to attend Boston College for Pre-law and nothing will stop her from becoming a BC Eagle Cheerleader. And, if my ex husband and I never got divorced, i do believe he would not be clean and sober today which is something that he should be very proud of.

And now widow! Widow is a tough word. The moment the word passes my lips, I know I’m making someone feel uncomfortable. But it is sort of like a badge of honor! Widows might be the strongest people i know! Widow! How can anyone use widow and perfect in the same sentence! Actually, in the same blog. When I met Billy, he was exactly what i needed at the exact time. He was safe and loved me hard. He listened to me and we made the best team and man, did he love his little ladies. He loved Brooklynn like his own and he was a great step father to her. Billy gave me the greatest gift. He helped me bring Monroe into this world. He knew I needed her. She is my legit heart walking outside my body. She is the kindest soul and she has kept me going over the last 2.5 years. Billy and I only had 10 years together. I so believe that I was his happily ever after. I was his forever love. I think that was the big man upstairs plan. So to be Billy’s wife, i had to be his widow too!

And you want to know something? I wake up every morning feeling blessed ( and no, my therapist states i’m not crazy). I get down on my knees and thank God for my girls, parents, friends, my village, my business and my community! Its never moving on, its moving forward! We only get one shot at this thing called life and its up to us to make our own happiness. I spend my days modeling appropriate grieving for my girls and together we are learning to live our new normal.

I don’t pretend to have all the answers. My hopes and dreams for this blog is to make people feel that they are not alone. I have been working on this blog for sometime but i thought today was the best to go live. Today has been 11 months since Billy died. One month shy of a year! Its crazy how time can fly and stand still at the same time. I know he is proud of us!

And so through my blogging, you will begin to understand why I describe my life as Imperfectly Perfect.

till next time…..,

with love, hope and hugs,

Julie

• August 2022
• July 2022